Prejudice From a Different Perspective
The freshman and sophomore classes at Cici's school go on a two day, two night retreat at the beginning of the school year so that the students can meet each other and develop teamwork skills and so forth. It might be a good idea, but for the second year in a row, Cici has come back with the clear impression that the students (and some of the teachers) at her school don't like Chinese, Vietnamese, and Korean students. She doesn't whine about it. She just reports the acts of prejudice and expresses her hurt feelings about it.
I heard the same thing from the Vietnamese student who rode home with us tonight, and I heard these kinds of comments from the Korean and Vietnamese students last year as well. They make fun of our eyes, Cici told me tonight. When we play games, they make comments that the Asian students should be last to play. They make fun of the way we speak English, and they call us stupid. I can see the hurt in her eyes when she tells me about these things. I tell her that I am very sorry that this happened, and I try to give a plausible explanation, but there is no excuse for this kind of behavior.
You know, Cici, I think that the students who make fun of you and the other Asian students may feel threatened by you, I told her. They see how hard you work in school. They see that you make better grades than they make, and I think that bothers them. They are not willing to work that hard. Oh, so maybe they think we are taking their places at the top of the class, Cici said. Yes, I think that is true, I told her.
Most of the hurtful comments come from the black and Mexican students. Cici and her Asian classmates have told me, but some of the white students participate as well. They don't understand why these comments are tolerated by the teachers, and they sure don't understand it when one of the teachers joins in the hurtful remarks. I don't know what to do about this. I do know that Cici doesn't want me to make a big issue of it, but the school has a problem and it needs to be addressed. Her Vietnamese friend, who is a very quiet and respectful girl, jokingly told Cici that if she were a U.S. Citizen, she would do something to hurt the students who were making fun of the Asian students.
The school has a new headmaster this year, and he looks to be either black or mulatto to me. Perhaps he will be more attuned to the existence and effects of prejudice, but I am struggling with how to handle this without putting Cici in a difficult position at school. Last year I made the decision to let it go, but it seems to be worse this year. I will wait until Ping returns next week and discuss it with her, then decide what to do about it.
The school has a new Chinese student, but she is an ABC and speaks no Chinese, Cici told me. See how lucky you are, I told her. You speak three languages now, and starting next year you will learn Spanish as well. As her English vocabulary expands, she is asking me more and more questions. Tonight she and her friend told me that they saw a rainbow while on the retreat. Her friend also had a rainbow blanket with her. Why does the rainbow stand for gay people, Cici asked me? The students were making fun of her friend for having a rainbow blanket, and saying that only a gay person would have a rainbow blanket.
So many issues to deal with, but at the moment Cici and I are just enjoying being back in our home office.
I heard the same thing from the Vietnamese student who rode home with us tonight, and I heard these kinds of comments from the Korean and Vietnamese students last year as well. They make fun of our eyes, Cici told me tonight. When we play games, they make comments that the Asian students should be last to play. They make fun of the way we speak English, and they call us stupid. I can see the hurt in her eyes when she tells me about these things. I tell her that I am very sorry that this happened, and I try to give a plausible explanation, but there is no excuse for this kind of behavior.
You know, Cici, I think that the students who make fun of you and the other Asian students may feel threatened by you, I told her. They see how hard you work in school. They see that you make better grades than they make, and I think that bothers them. They are not willing to work that hard. Oh, so maybe they think we are taking their places at the top of the class, Cici said. Yes, I think that is true, I told her.
Most of the hurtful comments come from the black and Mexican students. Cici and her Asian classmates have told me, but some of the white students participate as well. They don't understand why these comments are tolerated by the teachers, and they sure don't understand it when one of the teachers joins in the hurtful remarks. I don't know what to do about this. I do know that Cici doesn't want me to make a big issue of it, but the school has a problem and it needs to be addressed. Her Vietnamese friend, who is a very quiet and respectful girl, jokingly told Cici that if she were a U.S. Citizen, she would do something to hurt the students who were making fun of the Asian students.
The school has a new headmaster this year, and he looks to be either black or mulatto to me. Perhaps he will be more attuned to the existence and effects of prejudice, but I am struggling with how to handle this without putting Cici in a difficult position at school. Last year I made the decision to let it go, but it seems to be worse this year. I will wait until Ping returns next week and discuss it with her, then decide what to do about it.
The school has a new Chinese student, but she is an ABC and speaks no Chinese, Cici told me. See how lucky you are, I told her. You speak three languages now, and starting next year you will learn Spanish as well. As her English vocabulary expands, she is asking me more and more questions. Tonight she and her friend told me that they saw a rainbow while on the retreat. Her friend also had a rainbow blanket with her. Why does the rainbow stand for gay people, Cici asked me? The students were making fun of her friend for having a rainbow blanket, and saying that only a gay person would have a rainbow blanket.
So many issues to deal with, but at the moment Cici and I are just enjoying being back in our home office.
move her to Bellaire High School if you can, great school & high number of Asians who lead the school academicly.
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Welcome to our little place on the web, Harry. Do you have a child at Bellaire High School? It is a school that enjoys a great reputation, and I am curious about its student environment. I don't know anyone who attends there now, but the children of some of my friends and business colleagues attended that school.
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When my wife was pregnant and before I found out it that we were going to have a little boy I had wished for a little girl. In my eyes, the reason I wanted a little girl was that my feeling was children are less likely to discrimination than adults do. I had discussed this several times with my wife before our son was born not trying to raise any red flags with my new wife. I also felt that little Asian girls are much cuter (China dolls) than Caucasian children and it would be a lot more acceptable verses an Asian boy. However after reading your post Mr. Lee it is sad to still find discrimination in our schools today.
Children are born without discrimination. Our son has no idea what discrimination is at the age of 6 years old. All he really knows is Black, Chinese, Brown, etc, all in which are his friends. It is us, the parents that instill it in our children, and then we are sad to see them hurt by it.
Having a little boy really didn’t alarm my wife after he was born. She just wanted a healthy baby no matter what, however if she were to take him to China now he would be discriminated on a much larger scale by his peers there than here. Pretty much the same way that the Ameriasian children who were left behind after the Vietnam War. Its too bad discrimination can not be wiped out and we all are equally treated as in God’s eyes. This is truly a sad situation for our children, I’m still hoping for the “Dream” that the late Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. once spoke of.
“I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”
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Cici's first friend at her school has a Mexican parent and a Polish parent. They have remained friends from the beginning of their freshman year. I believe it would be accurate to say that Cici's other friends at school are all Vietnamese and Korean.
Interestingly enough, there seems to be no spark, no common bond, between Cici and the new American born Chinese student at school. They don't appear to be drawn to each other in the way that the Asian students who speak English as a second, third, or fourth language are drawn to each other. I haven't talked with her yet, and I don't know if her parents are also ABC, or whether they speak Chinese. She held the door open for us as we left the school with all the backpacks and duffel bags last night, and it seemed strange when Cici thanked her in English.
The girls were talking last night about some of the new students at their school. One of the boys looks like he is even taller than Yao Ming, Cici said. Yes, her friend said, there are three of them, and they can all "dunk." Now that was a word in their vocabulary that surprised me. I saw the boy they were talking about. He is tall and skinny as a rail, but nowhere near Yao's height. If he has the moves and a good supporting cast, though, the school should have a great basketball team this year. Athletic ability can help a student become popular no matter their race, so he should have no problem assimilating into the student population.
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No children there but live close by & see the student body coming & going with a high % of Asians.
Thanks for the welcome discovered your blog a few weeks ago & really enjoy it.
I am mid 60's, married yesterday 4 mo to a mid 50's chinese woman from Shanghai, we live in a modest area a few block from bellaire @ fondren so on the edge of china town, slightly over 1 mile to Welcome market, & Bellaire High just to the east.
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Sounds like you are on the East side of Chinatown. We are just a couple of miles North, and Andrew is to the West. We almost have it surrounded..
If you and your wife enjoy hotpot cooking, the Little Sheep Hot Pot & Grill where Andrew and his family and I ate Friday night is on Westheimer at Fountainview. We all enjoyed it very much.
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It sounds like Angela and her friends are too mature for this school.
I'm not sure what Ping will recommend, but I'd say you need to meet with the new headmaster about the issues that the girls are having, especially if there are staff members engaging in these actions. I think it would give them a big boost in their cause to have a representative of your stature.
I grew up around people that used silly words to talk about others, and I never understood it. We are all brothers, and sisters, under the sun. I wish there was a URL tag... But I'll just quote the lyrics.
Big Audio Dynamite's _Funny Names_
"A stranger's a friend
You just don't know
With a shake of the hand
We could give it a go
I look kinda pale
They call me gringo
You got funny hair
They call you negro
Under the skin say we're all the same
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
Funny names
I'm not like you
You're not like me
Don't think that will ever change
It's obvious to see
You're not like me
I'm not like you
Don't mean that we can't get along
And like each other too
'Cuz under the skin say we're all the same
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
Funny names
Recognise the difference
Give thanks we ain't the same
Variety's the spice of life
Hey fella what's your name
Some live in the city
Some come from ghettoes
Eat funny food
Speak funny lingo
Yes a stranger's a friend
You just don't know
Forever by your side
Just like a shadow
'Cos under the skin say we're all the same
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
How come when I turn my back
You call me funny names
Funny names
How come you call me funny names
Funny names"
Reading that, gave me an idea that maybe the girls should perhaps make an effort to reach out to others that are causing the problems with an open hand... Maybe I'm being a fool, but I've never turned down friendship...
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I can't say that I have ever heard the song or read the lyrics, Smitty. Thanks for posting them here.
My guess is that Ping will advise me to just let it go, and that might be the smart thing to do. There are several bits of sage advice that come to mind. You should never put your head above the skyline if you don't want to get shot. Don't ever be the leader; just be part of the pack. Better to be a king maker than to be a king. The closer you are to the top, the closer you are to the door. Ping added another phrase to my vocabulary. Some old Chinese wisdom: Most of the trouble that we have in life comes from our own mouth.
Now I know these truths to be self-evident, to turn a phrase, but for the life of me I have never been able to follow these rules. Why should I think that I can change now?
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I figured you weren't a fan of The Clash, which begat B.A.D., and they say sharing is caring...
However, and I don't in any way discredit Ping's or your wisdom, or the value of the comments that you selected, but I think there are two ways to look at this. One is that it shows the girls that some parts of life are not pretty, and hopefully that will help them to build a better character, after all idiots will grow up and still be idiots. The other is to take a more assertive tack and confront the issue. Oh, the third option might of course be a synthesis of the two other options for Angela to figure out.
Anyway, that's just my two cents.
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A fan of who?
It seems to me that Cici's school is following a well established pattern that has been established in America. I draw that conclusion from the summer reading assignments, which are focused on educating students about what it is like to be a black person in America. While there is nothing wrong with learning about this subject, in my view the school needs to recognize that it has a multi-cultural student population now. Why two reading assignments that focus on the same sub-culture? Can't the students get the point from one book, and then learn something about other sub-cultures from a different reading assignment? Haven't the Japanese and Chinese people, in particular, also been the subject of extreme prejudice in America, for example?
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Not The Who, The Clash!
If the parents don't raise a fuss, nothings gonna change!
And no, the students can't get the point from anything other than direct experience. Even then it's kind of iffy.
But yes, prejudice has been pretty well distributed in the US.
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I thought Who was on first ...
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No! Who's on second!
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Being interested in expanding my base of knowledge, I looked up The Clash. I had never heard of them. Now I know that they were "the only band that mattered." Well, in their own minds and the minds of some who followed their music. I don't know about any of the punk rock bands, so it is no surprise that I didn't know about The Clash.
The Who I have heard of - I Can See For Miles - and miles and miles.
Interestingly enough, these two groups are ranked back to back as numbers 29 (Who) and 30 (Clash) on Rolling Stones' list of the 100 Greatest Artists of All Time.
I was surprised to see the Stones coming in at only number 4. Dylan and Presley were just ahead of them, with The Beatles at the top. And Johnny Cash ranked ahead of Michael Jackson? Come on.
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You underestimate the influence of The Clash! Shouldn't Johnny Cash be ranked much farther ahead of Michael Jackson?
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From what I read, The Clash had a great deal of influence on how music developed over time, so I am not surprised by their ranking by Rolling Stone. I think Michael Jackson also influenced the performance of music a lot. I don't own any of his music, but I have seen enough of his music videos to have an appreciation for his talent. I am a country music fan, but never was a Johnny Cash fan, and I didn't have the impression that he did anything to influence the field of music. Rolling Stone obviously disagrees with my point of view, and surely they have people with more knowledge of the music business than the limited knowledge I have. But at least know I won't say "Who" when someone mentions The Clash.
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Country music fan that doesn't like Johnny Cash? Goodness! Johnny Cash not having an influence on the field of music? Good lord! Them's almost fighting words!
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Hey, you are talking to a guy who never heard of The Clash.
I am a Merle Haggard, Waylon Jennings, Willie, Loretta Lynn, Conway Twitty, George Jones kind of fan. And there are plenty of others in the country music field that I didn't name. These days it is George Strait, Brad Paisley, Alan Jackson, Randy Travis kind of fan, but not Tim McGraw or Toby Keith, among others.
But I am also a Rachmaninoff, Mozart, Debussy, Schumann, Bach, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, and many more of their genre kind of fan.
There are too many great '60's groups to even try to name, so I will just mention the Righteous Brothers and those fabulous English groups.
Here's a surprise for you. Wham over Springsteen.
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Don't mention Toby Keith around me! I don't care for Wham or Springsteen. However, did you know that Wham was the first western pop/rock group that China allowed to perform in China?
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I had no idea about Wham playing in China. I presume they played in Houston at some point, but I didn't see them and don't have any of their music. I just remember some of it.
We have seen a lot of singers in Houston. Back in the urban cowboy craze, everybody in the Houston area seemed to want to go to Gilley's. I liked his music but I never made it over to check out his place. His business partner, the man who gave him a chance to become a star, recently died. Sherwood Cryer. A friend of mine represented Sherwood in the bitter court battle that he and Mickey had when they broke up the business.
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I couldn't remember any Wham songs so I had to look them up, and I didn't even recognize any of the song names...
Can't say I'm familiar with Gilley's music, and I've only seen the beginning of Urban Cowboy. Maybe I'll put it on my movie queue at the library.
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What? Don't the Girls All Get Prettier at Closing Time is one of Gilley's top hits, as I recall. I thought everyone knew that song. Urban Cowboy is worth watching, I think.
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thank, we'll give it a try
again alway enjoy your blog
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Thanks Harry. I hope you will stick around.
Another old friend stopped by in cyberspace this evening and left a message about finding our blog. I hope Steve joins us with some posts that everyone can read.
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